JOKE OF THE MONTH https://vagabond.bg/ en COFFEE AND CROISSANTS, PLEASE https://vagabond.bg/coffee-and-croissants-please-3031 <span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">COFFEE AND CROISSANTS, PLEASE</span> <div class="field field--name-field-author-name field--type-string field--label-hidden field__item">by Stamen Manolov</div> <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><a title="View user profile." href="/user/251" lang="" about="/user/251" typeof="schema:Person" property="schema:name" datatype="" class="username">DimanaT</a></span> <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Thu, 04/29/2021 - 17:57</span> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-field-subtitle field--type-text-long field--label-hidden field__item"><h3>For reasons that are not immediately obvious and are therefore difficult to explain Bulgaria has gained the reputation of being a generator of genius computerists</h3> </div> <div class="field field--name-field-image field--type-image field--label-hidden field__items"> <div class="images-container clearfix"> <div class="image-preview clearfix"> <div class="image-wrapper clearfix"> <div class="field__item"> <div class="overlay-container"> <span class="overlay overlay--colored"> <span class="overlay-inner"> <span class="overlay-icon overlay-icon--button overlay-icon--white overlay-animated overlay-fade-top"> <i class="fa fa-plus"></i> </span> </span> <a class="overlay-target-link image-popup" href="https://vagabond.bg/sites/default/files/2021-04/joke%20of%20the%20month.jpg"></a> </span> <img src="/sites/default/files/2021-04/joke%20of%20the%20month.jpg" width="1000" height="618" alt="joke of the month" loading="lazy" typeof="foaf:Image" /> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p>It probably is, but the genius computerists hide themselves very well, and certainly do not work for Boyko Borisov's government.</p> <p>A set of supposedly confidential documents in MS Word, Excel etc, outlining Bulgaria's plans to request money from the EU for the National Recovery and Sustainability Plan post the Covid-19 pandemic were posted on Google Drive. Whoever did that left the docs unlocked, so anyone could edit and so on.</p> <p>Bulgarians with better knowledge of computers than the civil servants were quick to use the unexpected opportunity. One demanded coffee and croissants. Another asked "Where are my children's books?", possibly referring to the one book, Winnetou by Karl May, Prime Minister Boyko Borisov has admitted to reading.</p> <p>The government has spent in excess of 2 billion leva (1 billion euros) on "digitalisation."</p> <p>Boyko Borisov has asserted that the National Recovery Plan, which must be submitted to the EU by 30 April, will be left over for the next government. In this way the EU's poorest country risks being left outside the comprehensive recovery programme.</p> <p>A few hours after the "leak" someone, apparently a supervisor, sent out a message warning the officials not to post unlocked files on Google Drive. That message was itself unlocked, so everyone could join the reading party.</p> <p>Some people bothered to look into the attached links as well. What they discovered was that "modernisation" in fact referred to sprucing up a kindergarten while "digitalisation" meant renovating a building. </p> </div> <a href="/archive/issue-175" hreflang="en">Issue 175</a> <div class="field field--name-field-mt-post-category field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden field--entity-reference-target-type-taxonomy-term clearfix field__items"> <div class="field__item"><a href="/fun/joke-of-the-month" hreflang="en">JOKE OF THE MONTH</a></div> </div> <section class="field field--name-comment field--type-comment field--label-above comment-wrapper"> <h2 class="title comment-form__title">Add new comment</h2> <drupal-render-placeholder callback="comment.lazy_builders:renderForm" arguments="0=node&amp;1=3031&amp;2=comment&amp;3=comment" token="C-DRxx5dyBbUNOPojHx81HpiLBnUq6dTZK8aGLxaYAs"></drupal-render-placeholder> </section> Thu, 29 Apr 2021 14:57:19 +0000 DimanaT 3031 at https://vagabond.bg https://vagabond.bg/coffee-and-croissants-please-3031#comments MONEY FOR NOTHING https://vagabond.bg/money-nothing-2996 <span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">MONEY FOR NOTHING</span> <div class="field field--name-field-author-name field--type-string field--label-hidden field__item">by Stamen Manolov </div> <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><a title="View user profile." href="/user/251" lang="" about="/user/251" typeof="schema:Person" property="schema:name" datatype="" class="username">DimanaT</a></span> <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Thu, 04/01/2021 - 11:45</span> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-field-subtitle field--type-text-long field--label-hidden field__item"><h3>(But no chics for free)</h3> </div> <div class="field field--name-field-image field--type-image field--label-hidden field__items"> <div class="images-container clearfix"> <div class="image-preview clearfix"> <div class="image-wrapper clearfix"> <div class="field__item"> <div class="overlay-container"> <span class="overlay overlay--colored"> <span class="overlay-inner"> <span class="overlay-icon overlay-icon--button overlay-icon--white overlay-animated overlay-fade-top"> <i class="fa fa-plus"></i> </span> </span> <a class="overlay-target-link image-popup" href="https://vagabond.bg/sites/default/files/2021-04/money.jpg"></a> </span> <img src="/sites/default/files/2021-04/money.jpg" width="1000" height="280" alt="money.jpg " loading="lazy" typeof="foaf:Image" /> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p>Ahead of the general election scheduled for 4 April, which is expected to generate a record-low turnout owing to the ongoing Covid-19 pandemic, Boyko Borisov's chief prosecutor, Ivan Geshev, conducted a number of spectacular busts with an obvious potential for publicity. He cracked an alleged ring of spies for Russia, including some senior officials in the Defence Ministry and in various other state agencies. The group, according to the prosecution, sold sensitive military information to Russia – and received payments from the Russian Embassy. It is yet to be seen how the spy ring bust will evolve and whether the evidence gathered by Geshev's associates will hold water in court.</p> <p>Just before the spies, Geshev's people broke into a printing facility belonging to an university in Sofia to discover the printing machines were used to make... counterfeit US dollar and euro bills. The total amount of the fake money was $4 million and 3.6 million euros respectively.</p> <p>The chief prosecutor's publicity team trumpeted the action as a major achievement. Ivan Geshev and Ivaylo Ivanov, the chief secretary of the Interior Ministry, had their trophy photo taken in front of the "find."</p> <p>Initially, the courts remained unconvinced. They said the "bills" were of such a poor quality that they could not possibly be used for any illegal monetary transaction. No attempt had been made to make them look at least partly "genuine" as they were printed on ordinary paper of the sort to be found at stationery shops. For what they were, the "money" could not be considered even an attempted forgery.</p> <p>The people arrested during the bust were released. It transpired later that they never attempted to conceal they were printing paper money. In actual fact, their business was to supply "dollar bills" and "euro notes" to... fun gift shops to be used at parties and baptism celebrations.</p> <p>The "prop" money explanation failed to convince the Bulgarian National Bank, however. Its experts inspected the money and said they did not conform to the definition of "stage prop" cash. Though they were printed on printing presses manufactured in 1987 and on paper without any watermarks the bills did resemble real money sufficiently well.</p> <p>Observers surmised the fake money case had two aspects to it. The perpetrators either failed to print genuine counterfeit money or failed to print real stage prop bills. To put it in another way, the courts will now have to decide between fail and fail. </p> </div> <a href="/archive/issue-174" hreflang="en">Issue 174</a> <div class="field field--name-field-mt-post-category field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden field--entity-reference-target-type-taxonomy-term clearfix field__items"> <div class="field__item"><a href="/fun/joke-of-the-month" hreflang="en">JOKE OF THE MONTH</a></div> </div> <section class="field field--name-comment field--type-comment field--label-above comment-wrapper"> <h2 class="title comment-form__title">Add new comment</h2> <drupal-render-placeholder callback="comment.lazy_builders:renderForm" arguments="0=node&amp;1=2996&amp;2=comment&amp;3=comment" token="1Zmd1qJIp-r9FCvaR7g3c6HizB7OiS6XRHOLViK61gE"></drupal-render-placeholder> </section> Thu, 01 Apr 2021 08:45:21 +0000 DimanaT 2996 at https://vagabond.bg https://vagabond.bg/money-nothing-2996#comments LONG LIVE BOYKO BORISOV! https://vagabond.bg/long-live-boyko-borisov-2948 <span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">LONG LIVE BOYKO BORISOV!</span> <div class="field field--name-field-author-name field--type-string field--label-hidden field__item">by Stamen Manolov</div> <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><a title="View user profile." href="/user/251" lang="" about="/user/251" typeof="schema:Person" property="schema:name" datatype="" class="username">DimanaT</a></span> <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Thu, 02/25/2021 - 19:01</span> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-field-subtitle field--type-text-long field--label-hidden field__item"><h3>The local hacks would not have noticed had it not been for Novosti, a Serbian newspaper: Boyko Borisov has sent a gift to his Serbian counterpart, Aleksandar Vučić, depicting the two state leaders at an inspection of the Turkish Stream gas pipeline project.</h3> </div> <div class="field field--name-field-image field--type-image field--label-hidden field__items"> <div class="images-container clearfix"> <div class="image-preview clearfix"> <div class="image-wrapper clearfix"> <div class="field__item"> <div class="overlay-container"> <span class="overlay overlay--colored"> <span class="overlay-inner"> <span class="overlay-icon overlay-icon--button overlay-icon--white overlay-animated overlay-fade-top"> <i class="fa fa-plus"></i> </span> </span> <a class="overlay-target-link image-popup" href="https://vagabond.bg/sites/default/files/2021-02/141543979_10157966011944537_4517761964430739927_n.jpg"></a> </span> <img src="/sites/default/files/2021-02/141543979_10157966011944537_4517761964430739927_n.jpg" width="770" height="578" alt="the painting" loading="lazy" typeof="foaf:Image" /> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="field uk-text-bold uk-margin-small-top uk-margin-medium-bottom field--name-field-image-credits field--type-string field--label-hidden field__item">The painting</div> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p>The picture, in oil, executed in the best (or worst) traditions of late Socialist Realism was immediately picked up by social media users. They were quick to come up with their own variants, ridiculing Bulgaria's Borisov whose authoritarian methods they claim increasingly resemble those of his Communist-era predecessors.</p> <p>The Bulgarian Council of Ministers sent out a press release that the picture in question was one of a series of artworks commissioned by Arkad Engineering &amp; Construction, the Saudi Arabian contractor for the pipeline project.</p> <p><img alt="the photograph" data-entity-type="" data-entity-uuid="" src="/sites/default/files/issues/173/long%20live%20boyko%20borisov/141060664_2872388059706927_1915209170496763269_n.jpg" class="align-center" /></p> <p class="text-align-center"><em>The photograph</em></p> <p>The picture was inspired by a photograph released by the Council of Ministers when Vučić visited in the summer of 2020. Its painter was none lesser than Simeon Krastev, a famous Bulgarian artist and illustrator whose work has included many opera, theatre and movie posters.</p> <p>Krastev was invited into a TV studio to discuss his Boyko Borisov oeuvre. He refused to acknowledge it was in any way "Socialist Realist," and insisted it was just realist: "I couldn't have painted an abstract portrait of the prime minister." He added it was perfectly OK for artists to work on commission from state leaders. In fact they have done so, Krastev said, since the times of Titian.</p> <p><img alt="the memes" data-entity-type="" data-entity-uuid="" src="/sites/default/files/issues/173/long%20live%20boyko%20borisov/141034999_10157966511024537_1316082554731076306_o.jpg" class="align-center" /></p> <p class="text-align-center"><em>The memes...</em></p> <p>The Bulgarian facebookers, however, were not mollified. They produced dozens of copycat pictures ridiculing both the artist and the prime minister: from adding Putin in the background (indicating their conviction the pipeline project was his brainchild) to running a doctored photograph of Stalin (where someone in the original picture was "disappeared") to... getting involved US Senator Bernie Sanders wearing his telltale mittens sitting in front of the notorious picture of Borisov and Vučić.</p> <p><img alt="the memes" data-entity-type="" data-entity-uuid="" src="/sites/default/files/issues/173/long%20live%20boyko%20borisov/Screenshot%202021-01-23%20at%2006.43.40.jpg" class="align-center" /></p> <p><img alt="bernie sanders" data-entity-type="" data-entity-uuid="" src="/sites/default/files/issues/173/long%20live%20boyko%20borisov/142077722_681520165861267_3487149596865473354_n.jpg" class="align-center" /></p> <p> </p> </div> <a href="/archive/issue-173" hreflang="en">Issue 173</a> <a href="/taxonomy/term/261" hreflang="en">Boyko Borisov</a> <div class="field field--name-field-mt-post-category field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden field--entity-reference-target-type-taxonomy-term clearfix field__items"> <div class="field__item"><a href="/fun/joke-of-the-month" hreflang="en">JOKE OF THE MONTH</a></div> </div> <section class="field field--name-comment field--type-comment field--label-above comment-wrapper"> <h2 class="title comment-form__title">Add new comment</h2> <drupal-render-placeholder callback="comment.lazy_builders:renderForm" arguments="0=node&amp;1=2948&amp;2=comment&amp;3=comment" token="hs428-Y0aiBfspiyb-_16fW8Knw3Kz91KE9tdlbDbjA"></drupal-render-placeholder> </section> Thu, 25 Feb 2021 17:01:06 +0000 DimanaT 2948 at https://vagabond.bg https://vagabond.bg/long-live-boyko-borisov-2948#comments NO SAUERKRAUT IN BG AMBULANCES https://vagabond.bg/no-sauerkraut-bg-ambulances-2920 <span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">NO SAUERKRAUT IN BG AMBULANCES</span> <div class="field field--name-field-author-name field--type-string field--label-hidden field__item">by Stamen Manolov</div> <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><a title="View user profile." href="/user/251" lang="" about="/user/251" typeof="schema:Person" property="schema:name" datatype="" class="username">DimanaT</a></span> <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Thu, 12/31/2020 - 12:48</span> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-field-subtitle field--type-text-long field--label-hidden field__item"><h3>Late autumn is a special season in Bulgaria.</h3> </div> <div class="field field--name-field-image field--type-image field--label-hidden field__items"> <div class="images-container clearfix"> <div class="image-preview clearfix"> <div class="image-wrapper clearfix"> <div class="field__item"> <div class="overlay-container"> <span class="overlay overlay--colored"> <span class="overlay-inner"> <span class="overlay-icon overlay-icon--button overlay-icon--white overlay-animated overlay-fade-top"> <i class="fa fa-plus"></i> </span> </span> <a class="overlay-target-link image-popup" href="https://vagabond.bg/sites/default/files/2020-12/joke%20of%20the%20month.jpg"></a> </span> <img src="/sites/default/files/2020-12/joke%20of%20the%20month.jpg" width="1000" height="714" alt="joke of the month.jpg" loading="lazy" typeof="foaf:Image" /> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p>The overwhelming majority of Bulgarians wait in earnest for the sauerkraut, or <em>kiselo zele</em>, to ferment, or <em>vtasa</em>. Given the right preparation (in a plastic container called <em>bidonche</em>, stored in a basement, daily circulation of brine, or <em>pretakane</em>) and favourable weather conditions (neither too warm, nor too cold) the year's yield of sauerkraut should be in just ahead of Christmas.</p> <p>But the 2020 holiday season was like no other since 1989, when Christmas was reinstated as a public holiday after 40 years of being declared just an ordinary working day. In 2020, in addition to all the goodies (slightly higher pensions, promises of bonuses for medical workers) handed out by Prime Minister Boyko Borisov, Bulgarians have become used to the sight of speeding ambulances with their sirens on and lights blinking. Add to that the horror stories of people waiting for up to 12 hours for emergency to arrive or of patients dying on the doorstep of hospitals refusing to take them in. Not very funny, not by any civilised standard.</p> <p>Yet Bulgaria's pervasive sense of black humour can and does defy the calamities of the times, notwithstanding the coronavirus. And unlike the dark Christmasless times when jokes had to be told in a hush-hush manner for fear the neighbours might be listening in, now Bulgarians have Facebook where anything at all goes.</p> <p>So, it did not take long for some anonymous user to devise the above collage of a Sofia ambulance, suggesting its cargo consisted of... cabbages being transited for sauerkraut preparation. Those unfamiliar with local practices might be puzzled, but Bulgarians are used to seeing carrier wagons of all shapes and sizes full of fresh cabbages this time of the year. So, the ambulance prank appeared realistic. Perhaps an ambulance driver was just stoking up on cabbages.</p> <p>The collage in question gained such a momentum on social media that Sofia emergency services issued an official press release denying the allegations an ambulance carried "vegetables." The ambulance seen in the photos, the press release went on, carried "biological refuse" to the Aleksandrovska Hospital incinerator. The plastic sacks were marked with a hazardous sign, in keeping with established protocols. "Insinuations like that, given the extremely tough situation faced by the emergency services and the whole health care system, are, to put it mildly, not in order," the press release concluded.</p> <p>Not very funny for a not very funny holiday season. </p> </div> <a href="/archive/issue-171-172" hreflang="en">Issue 171-172</a> <a href="/taxonomy/term/260" hreflang="en">coronavirus</a> <div class="field field--name-field-mt-post-category field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden field--entity-reference-target-type-taxonomy-term clearfix field__items"> <div class="field__item"><a href="/fun/joke-of-the-month" hreflang="en">JOKE OF THE MONTH</a></div> </div> <section class="field field--name-comment field--type-comment field--label-above comment-wrapper"> <h2 class="title comment-form__title">Add new comment</h2> <drupal-render-placeholder callback="comment.lazy_builders:renderForm" arguments="0=node&amp;1=2920&amp;2=comment&amp;3=comment" token="4clZKQUDSwwQn-3vGZC0MkJhoMM7_evNiueL_rIS0Uc"></drupal-render-placeholder> </section> Thu, 31 Dec 2020 10:48:11 +0000 DimanaT 2920 at https://vagabond.bg https://vagabond.bg/no-sauerkraut-bg-ambulances-2920#comments ARBEIT MACHT FREI https://vagabond.bg/arbeit-macht-frei-2879 <span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">ARBEIT MACHT FREI</span> <div class="field field--name-field-author-name field--type-string field--label-hidden field__item">by Stamen Manolov</div> <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><a title="View user profile." href="/user/251" lang="" about="/user/251" typeof="schema:Person" property="schema:name" datatype="" class="username">DimanaT</a></span> <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Mon, 11/30/2020 - 11:42</span> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-field-subtitle field--type-text-long field--label-hidden field__item"><h3>As millions of Americans have come to understand, things can become pretty unpredictable whenever outgoing President Donald Trump is left alone with his smartphone.</h3> </div> <div class="field field--name-field-image field--type-image field--label-hidden field__items"> <div class="images-container clearfix"> <div class="image-preview clearfix"> <div class="image-wrapper clearfix"> <div class="field__item"> <div class="overlay-container"> <span class="overlay overlay--colored"> <span class="overlay-inner"> <span class="overlay-icon overlay-icon--button overlay-icon--white overlay-animated overlay-fade-top"> <i class="fa fa-plus"></i> </span> </span> <a class="overlay-target-link image-popup" href="https://vagabond.bg/sites/default/files/2020-11/Joke%20of%20the%20month%20170.jpg"></a> </span> <img src="/sites/default/files/2020-11/Joke%20of%20the%20month%20170.jpg" width="1000" height="377" alt="Joke of the month 170.jpg " loading="lazy" typeof="foaf:Image" /> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p>The tweeting machine is set in motion, slamming anyone the president for reasons that will probably remain a mystery forever considers a "hater" and a "loser."</p> <p>The situation in Boyko Borisov's Bulgaria is essentially the same. There is a notable exception, however. As Twitter has not really caught on in this country its most powerful man and leader for over 11 years uses as his chief means of communication with the laity his smartphone – not to tweet but to get himself televised while driving around his Land Cruiser, "inspecting" asphalt roads in the process of being constructed.</p> <p>In the annals of revelatory Boyko Borisov's videoed drives, his November outing in the company of this country's top medics, Health Minister Kostadin Angelov and the chief of Sofia's Pirogov emergency hospital Professor Asen Baltov, was particularly outstanding. In the midst of the severe Covid-19 crisis when sick people are being turned away from hospitals, general practitioners refuse to treat patients except by phone, it takes up to 10 hours for ambulances to arrive to pick up suffocating people and key medicines are in short supply in the pharmacies, Prime Minister Boyko Borisov immersed himself in unabashed self-praise for the "excellence" of the roads he considers his chief achievement while being prime minister. "Look at that," he repeatedly told the top medics. "Isn't it a beauty?"</p> <p>The doctors nodded from the backseat and grudgingly agreed. Professor Baltov tried to explain doctors were treating 1,900 patients at the same time, but was interrupted by the prime minister: "Look, Baltov, aren't those road markings just superb?!"</p> <p>You should heal people and send them back to the production lines as soon as possible, Prime Minister Boyko Borisov went on to say, because work makes you free. Yup, that's correct. Arbeit macht frei.</p> <p>Some Facebook progressives were quick to slam what they saw as the Bulgarian prime minister's uncouth usage of extreme Nazi terminology, but the general public remained unperturbed. Boyko Borisov's preternatural gift for populism and self-aggrandisement, often at the expense of others, friends and foes alike, continues to toy with this country's attention just as it has since the 2000s when the man emerged on the public scene. Against this background covfefe looks like a very insignificant piece of cake indeed. </p> </div> <a href="/archive/issue-170" hreflang="en">Issue 170</a> <a href="/taxonomy/term/261" hreflang="en">Boyko Borisov</a> <div class="field field--name-field-mt-post-category field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden field--entity-reference-target-type-taxonomy-term clearfix field__items"> <div class="field__item"><a href="/fun/joke-of-the-month" hreflang="en">JOKE OF THE MONTH</a></div> </div> <section class="field field--name-comment field--type-comment field--label-above comment-wrapper"> <h2 class="title comment-form__title">Add new comment</h2> <drupal-render-placeholder callback="comment.lazy_builders:renderForm" arguments="0=node&amp;1=2879&amp;2=comment&amp;3=comment" token="mbcGKKhJP_sTNq-aLh_SGTclmaAE9iUjZbbuV8YCyYM"></drupal-render-placeholder> </section> Mon, 30 Nov 2020 09:42:03 +0000 DimanaT 2879 at https://vagabond.bg https://vagabond.bg/arbeit-macht-frei-2879#comments WHAT WE HAVE AS A TOPIC... https://vagabond.bg/what-we-have-topic-2851 <span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">WHAT WE HAVE AS A TOPIC...</span> <div class="field field--name-field-author-name field--type-string field--label-hidden field__item">by Stamen Manolov</div> <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><a title="View user profile." href="/user/251" lang="" about="/user/251" typeof="schema:Person" property="schema:name" datatype="" class="username">DimanaT</a></span> <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Fri, 10/30/2020 - 12:15</span> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-field-subtitle field--type-text-long field--label-hidden field__item"><p>Tsvetan Tsvetanov, the leader of the Republicans for Bulgaria political party that has been registered to stand in the 2021 general election, may be a man of few academic achievements but he is obviously one of many words, actions and apartments in Sofia, which he has obtained at very cutdown prices.</p> </div> <div class="field field--name-field-image field--type-image field--label-hidden field__items"> <div class="images-container clearfix"> <div class="image-preview clearfix"> <div class="image-wrapper clearfix"> <div class="field__item"> <div class="overlay-container"> <span class="overlay overlay--colored"> <span class="overlay-inner"> <span class="overlay-icon overlay-icon--button overlay-icon--white overlay-animated overlay-fade-top"> <i class="fa fa-plus"></i> </span> </span> <a class="overlay-target-link image-popup" href="https://vagabond.bg/sites/default/files/2020-10/tsvetan%20tsvetanov.jpg"></a> </span> <img src="/sites/default/files/2020-10/tsvetan%20tsvetanov.jpg" width="752" height="1000" alt="tsvetan tsvetanov.jpg " loading="lazy" typeof="foaf:Image" /> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="field uk-text-bold uk-margin-small-top uk-margin-medium-bottom field--name-field-image-credits field--type-string field--label-hidden field__item">Tsvetan Tsvetanov </div> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p>Tsv. Tsv., as he is sometimes popularly referred to, is the head of the Euro-Atlantic Centre for Security, a thinktank set up by himself when he was forced to resign from GERB, in 2019. Tsvetanov and "thinktank" in the same sentence? – some cynics Bulgarians have wondered. In actual fact, Tsv. has described the purpose of his centre as one designed "to provide quality professional analyses, to generate ideas and to seek opportunities to publicise a variety of standpoints by encouraging debates on security sector issues." It is unclear what sort of "analyses" the EACS has produced during one year of its existence, but what few Bulgarians have any doubts about is that during his time in Bulgarian politics, since the late 2000s, Tsv.'s style has become as inimitable as that of his former boss, Prime Minister Boyko Borisov. </p> <p>This is how Tsvetan Tsvetanov has described his new political agendas: </p> <p>"What we have as a topic, which will be discussed, and a topic that you have asked me about, then I think that we will have more clarity on the topics, which I don't think we will have to turn into a free-for-all conversation in public space, because you see what's happening, but we still adhere to some normal topics that cannot invoke any discomfort or tensions about similar topics in these specific areas. You do understand that what it is not is not the same thing. In the whole thing that is happening these are the things that are important, and they are not what they are alleged to be."</p> <p>Please note the translation above has been made from the Bulgarian verbatim.</p> </div> <a href="/archive/issue-169" hreflang="en">Issue 169</a> <div class="field field--name-field-mt-post-category field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden field--entity-reference-target-type-taxonomy-term clearfix field__items"> <div class="field__item"><a href="/fun/joke-of-the-month" hreflang="en">JOKE OF THE MONTH</a></div> </div> <section class="field field--name-comment field--type-comment field--label-above comment-wrapper"> <h2 class="title comment-form__title">Add new comment</h2> <drupal-render-placeholder callback="comment.lazy_builders:renderForm" arguments="0=node&amp;1=2851&amp;2=comment&amp;3=comment" token="jFyv6Hf_nPSZqUTZEfDdHwn15rhSJAI1nfMYq45KNdE"></drupal-render-placeholder> </section> Fri, 30 Oct 2020 10:15:05 +0000 DimanaT 2851 at https://vagabond.bg https://vagabond.bg/what-we-have-topic-2851#comments 'VIRTUAL' ANIMALS SUCK EU FUNDS https://vagabond.bg/virtual-animals-suck-eu-funds-2606 <span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">&#039;VIRTUAL&#039; ANIMALS SUCK EU FUNDS</span> <div class="field field--name-field-author-name field--type-string field--label-hidden field__item">by Stamen Manolov</div> <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><a title="View user profile." href="/user/251" lang="" about="/user/251" typeof="schema:Person" property="schema:name" datatype="" class="username">DimanaT</a></span> <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Thu, 09/03/2020 - 08:15</span> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-field-subtitle field--type-text-long field--label-hidden field__item"><h3>"Virtual animals" that exist in the registers of the Agriculture Ministry but not in real life suck up dozens of millions of leva in both EU and national subsidies, Simeon Karakolev, the chairman of the Bulgarian Association of Sheep and Goat Breeders, told the media.</h3> </div> <div class="field field--name-field-image field--type-image field--label-hidden field__items"> <div class="images-container clearfix"> <div class="image-preview clearfix"> <div class="image-wrapper clearfix"> <div class="field__item"> <div class="overlay-container"> <span class="overlay overlay--colored"> <span class="overlay-inner"> <span class="overlay-icon overlay-icon--button overlay-icon--white overlay-animated overlay-fade-top"> <i class="fa fa-plus"></i> </span> </span> <a class="overlay-target-link image-popup" href="https://vagabond.bg/sites/default/files/2020-09/joke%20of%20the%20month.jpg"></a> </span> <img src="/sites/default/files/2020-09/joke%20of%20the%20month.jpg" width="1000" height="667" alt="sheep monument" loading="lazy" typeof="foaf:Image" /> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="field uk-text-bold uk-margin-small-top uk-margin-medium-bottom field--name-field-image-credits field--type-string field--label-hidden field__item">© Anthony Georgieff</div> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p>According to him, there were anywhere between 100,000 and 120,000 "virtual animals" getting about 20 million leva per year, adding the grand total was a lot more as there was no reliable data about virtual cows and bees.</p> <p>Karakolev explained the scheme to purloin subsidies was as simple as, well, fending sheep. Every farming animal in this country has to wear an earmark with a unique identification number. If the animal dies or gets sent to a slaughterhouse the farmer must return the earmark to the local vet to get the animal deregistered. Farmers do not that, Karakolev indicated, and went on to say the earmarks of dead animals were being kept to enable the continuing receipt of funds. A sheep makes as much as 40 leva per year in state subsidies. Officials and vets were involved in the racket, he said.</p> <p>EU funds were being stolen through "virtual" pastures as well. According to the law, the more animals a farmer owns the larger plot of pasture land he is entitled to from his local council. Then he makes 120 leva per year per acre in EU subsides. In extreme cases farmers with genuine livestock are unable to take them to pasture because the pastures are being "used" by "virtual animals."</p> <p>Estimatedly, as many as 20 percent of all farming animals in Bulgaria are in actual fact non-existent. While real live cows can be relatively easy to count, state officials may have bigger trouble producing an even remotely precise number of this country's bees.</p> <p>Earlier in the summer, Boyko Borisov's agriculture minister, Desislava Taneva, advised farmers to keep their activities hush and "not to boast about what crooks we are" for fear the EU may terminate the farming subsidies. </p> </div> <a href="/archive/issue-167-168" hreflang="en">Issue 167-168</a> <div class="field field--name-field-mt-post-category field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden field--entity-reference-target-type-taxonomy-term clearfix field__items"> <div class="field__item"><a href="/fun/joke-of-the-month" hreflang="en">JOKE OF THE MONTH</a></div> </div> <section class="field field--name-comment field--type-comment field--label-above comment-wrapper"> <h2 class="title comment-form__title">Add new comment</h2> <drupal-render-placeholder callback="comment.lazy_builders:renderForm" arguments="0=node&amp;1=2606&amp;2=comment&amp;3=comment" token="91Fs9avrZpOPRzBmHXsxzu2txFAyTzEMoFFqUqLppQg"></drupal-render-placeholder> </section> Thu, 03 Sep 2020 05:15:36 +0000 DimanaT 2606 at https://vagabond.bg https://vagabond.bg/virtual-animals-suck-eu-funds-2606#comments INSPECTING SITES, GIVING DIRECTIONS https://vagabond.bg/inspecting-sites-giving-directions-2349 <span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">INSPECTING SITES, GIVING DIRECTIONS</span> <div class="field field--name-field-author-name field--type-string field--label-hidden field__item">by Stamen Manolov</div> <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><a title="View user profile." href="/user/251" lang="" about="/user/251" typeof="schema:Person" property="schema:name" datatype="" class="username">DimanaT</a></span> <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Wed, 08/05/2020 - 11:26</span> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-field-subtitle field--type-text-long field--label-hidden field__item"><h3>Fortunately for the Bulgarians, North Korea is far away, and though it was once a friend it no longer is. Yet, thanks to the increasingly grotesque regime of Boyko Borisov, there are important similarities. Both Borisov and his North Korean counterpart, Kim Jong-un, like to be seen inspecting things.</h3> </div> <div class="field field--name-field-image field--type-image field--label-hidden field__items"> <div class="images-container clearfix"> <div class="image-preview clearfix"> <div class="image-wrapper clearfix"> <div class="field__item"> <div class="overlay-container"> <span class="overlay overlay--colored"> <span class="overlay-inner"> <span class="overlay-icon overlay-icon--button overlay-icon--white overlay-animated overlay-fade-top"> <i class="fa fa-plus"></i> </span> </span> <a class="overlay-target-link image-popup" href="https://vagabond.bg/sites/default/files/2020-08/joke%20of%20the%20month.jpg"></a> </span> <img src="/sites/default/files/2020-08/joke%20of%20the%20month.jpg" width="1000" height="421" alt="joke of the month.jpg " loading="lazy" typeof="foaf:Image" /> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p>Both Borisov and his North Korean counterpart, Kim Jong-un, like to be seen inspecting things. In this way they want to assert their authority over the production lines and display their munificence owing to which these production lines were installed in the first place. Kim Jong-un is usually photographed surrounded by stern-looking Communist officials holding little notebook pads in their hands to jot down any wisdom that may come from the Supreme Leader's mouth. In Bulgaria, Boyko Borisov does the driving himself in his private SUV. The back seat is reserved for a minister or a local dignitary, and the iPhone is set rolling by his personal publicist. Kim Jong-un can easily send to a labour camp any of the surrounding officials who fail to listen carefully. Labour camps, luckily, no longer exist in Bulgaria but if you get selected for a ride in the back of Boyko Borisov's jeep you should be very, very careful. The Supreme Leader's chief prosecutor has eyes and ears everywhere.</p> <p>In recent years, as the situation in the country deteriorates and some Bulgarians are even taking to the streets because they have suddenly realised Boyko Borisov is more like the capo of an organised crime syndicate rather than the protector against Communism he liked to portray himself as, his advisers tend to intensify the jeep jaunts. </p> <p>The similarities between Boyko Borisov and Kim Jong-un do not end here, however. Both leaders must be seen surrounded by happy and applauding people, sputtering out their love and joy. It is impossible to verify from independent sources whether the North Koreans' love and joy at meetings with Kim Jong-un are genuine, but in Bulgaria they are not. At least not in Vratsa, in northwestern Bulgaria, where Prime Minister Boyko Borisov recently paid a visit to inspect some factories and infrastructure projects. A local TV station reported the crowd greeting Boyko Borisov and expressing gratitude to him for his magnanimity in fact consisted of... GERB members who had been bussed in at short notice to ensure there are people around to welcome their supreme leader. </p> </div> <div class="field field--name-field-mt-post-category field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden field--entity-reference-target-type-taxonomy-term clearfix field__items"> <div class="field__item"><a href="/fun/joke-of-the-month" hreflang="en">JOKE OF THE MONTH</a></div> </div> <section class="field field--name-comment field--type-comment field--label-above comment-wrapper"> <h2 class="title comment-form__title">Add new comment</h2> <drupal-render-placeholder callback="comment.lazy_builders:renderForm" arguments="0=node&amp;1=2349&amp;2=comment&amp;3=comment" token="HF016Eg__wfQwF5gxDOShl2veFcGlKT5bmzpub3wjBo"></drupal-render-placeholder> </section> Wed, 05 Aug 2020 08:26:33 +0000 DimanaT 2349 at https://vagabond.bg https://vagabond.bg/inspecting-sites-giving-directions-2349#comments STUPID C*NT FROM KARDZHALI https://vagabond.bg/stupid-cnt-kardzhali-1812 <span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">STUPID C*NT FROM KARDZHALI</span> <div class="field field--name-field-author-name field--type-string field--label-hidden field__item">by Stamen Manolov</div> <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><a title="View user profile." href="/user/251" lang="" about="/user/251" typeof="schema:Person" property="schema:name" datatype="" class="username">DimanaT</a></span> <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Fri, 07/03/2020 - 11:32</span> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-field-subtitle field--type-text-long field--label-hidden field__item"><h3>Аnd other bons mots from the Bulgarian prime minister</h3> </div> <div class="field field--name-field-image field--type-image field--label-hidden field__items"> <div class="images-container clearfix"> <div class="image-preview clearfix"> <div class="image-wrapper clearfix"> <div class="field__item"> <div class="overlay-container"> <span class="overlay overlay--colored"> <span class="overlay-inner"> <span class="overlay-icon overlay-icon--button overlay-icon--white overlay-animated overlay-fade-top"> <i class="fa fa-plus"></i> </span> </span> <a class="overlay-target-link image-popup" href="https://vagabond.bg/sites/default/files/2020-07/Boyko%20Borisov%20Tsveta%20Karayancheva.jpg"></a> </span> <img src="/sites/default/files/2020-07/Boyko%20Borisov%20Tsveta%20Karayancheva.jpg" width="1000" height="867" alt="Boyko Borisov Tsveta Karayancheva.jpg" loading="lazy" typeof="foaf:Image" /> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p>Boyko Borisov, Bulgaria's prime minister during the past 11 years, may have many faults, his critics say, but he is without a doubt a master of the Bulgarian language. Borisov's virtuoso use of the lingo plays on many levels. His uncouth nativism enchants some domestic audiences, especially cab drivers and horsecart repairers. At the same time his obsequious promises of police cooperation endears his Western counterparts. Last but not least his off-the-cuff rant confounds his translators and interpreters who are usually caught between the fire of having to translate exactly what this country's prime minister has to say and the frying pan of having to keep their translations to what is fit to print and/or speak out.</p> <p>The collection of Boyko "Big Brother" Borisov's bons mots, and the impact they have had on millions of Bulgarians, will provide fodder for thought for politicians, sociologists, fire fighters, road builders, psychologists and probably psychiatrists for years to come. From a purely linguistic point of view, the prime minister's speech is difficult to pinpoint. Sometimes his language evokes a streetwise small-time crook from the outskirts who's just arrived in a posh neighbourhood. At other times there is the football fan, an yob, whose bark is worse than his bite. As he usually peppers his language with some officialese to make it sound more convincing, Borisov sometimes reminds of a mid-level office clerk. More often than not, he acts and speaks like the boss of a criminal syndicate, a padrino, minus the elegance and the refinement.</p> <p>To Bulgaria's prime minister the journalists politely asking questions are "turkey hens." Once upon a time he used to communicate with them through text messages (Twitter was in its infancy and then it's never been particularly popular in Bulgaria). To the more daring ones he has promised he'd let them "touch his muscle." Touché.</p> <p>Then, perhaps unwittingly, he has resorted to different rhetoric tactics. Trying to appease workers unhappy over their unpaid salaries he has propounded: "You are simple people. And I am a simple man. That's why we'll get together."</p> <p>His critics, he recently said, are tulups. A tulup, probably of Turkish origin, may mean a/ a thick furry overcoat, b/ a stupid man, and c/ a toe loup jump, a figure in skating. Borisov is presumably not very interested in skating, so it would be safe to assume he meant the first or the second.</p> <p>However, anything he has said of recent pales in comparison to his June 2020 assertion about Tsveta Karayancheva, the current speaker of the National Assembly and Boyko Borisov's own handpicked nominee. In an audio recording released on the Internet, someone alleged to be Boyko Borisov refers to Mrs Karayancheva as a "stupid c*nt from Kardzhali."</p> <p>Who made the recording, who is Borisov speaking with and how it leaked out will probably remain a mystery forever – or at least until the prime minister remains in office.</p> <p>A few days after the recordings were made public an enraged Borisov, surrounded by his senior associates, gave a press conference. Mrs Karayancheva stood next to him. This is sometimes how we talk to each other, Borisov said, then grabbed the astounded woman and kissed her on the head. Touché. </p> </div> <a href="/archive/issue-165" hreflang="en">Issue 165</a> <a href="/taxonomy/term/261" hreflang="en">Boyko Borisov</a> <div class="field field--name-field-mt-post-category field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden field--entity-reference-target-type-taxonomy-term clearfix field__items"> <div class="field__item"><a href="/fun/joke-of-the-month" hreflang="en">JOKE OF THE MONTH</a></div> </div> <section class="field field--name-comment field--type-comment field--label-above comment-wrapper"> <h2 class="title comment-form__title">Add new comment</h2> <drupal-render-placeholder callback="comment.lazy_builders:renderForm" arguments="0=node&amp;1=1812&amp;2=comment&amp;3=comment" token="LrFAU6-7Ca83oaUOcpxmO9ZafmtAJYtiMR9pCOolv0Y"></drupal-render-placeholder> </section> Fri, 03 Jul 2020 08:32:12 +0000 DimanaT 1812 at https://vagabond.bg https://vagabond.bg/stupid-cnt-kardzhali-1812#comments COVID-19 JOKES MAKE ROUNDS IN BG https://vagabond.bg/covid-19-jokes-make-rounds-bg-337 <span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">COVID-19 JOKES MAKE ROUNDS IN BG</span> <div class="field field--name-field-author-name field--type-string field--label-hidden field__item">by Stamen Manolov</div> <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><a title="View user profile." href="/user/251" lang="" about="/user/251" typeof="schema:Person" property="schema:name" datatype="" class="username">DimanaT</a></span> <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Tue, 06/02/2020 - 17:33</span> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-field-subtitle field--type-text-long field--label-hidden field__item"><h3>Well, well, well, romance is a thing of the past. Once you had to sleep with someone to catch something dangerous. Now it is enough to sneeze...</h3> <p> </p> </div> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p>*</p> <p>Covid-19 is like a cuckold. Some people are. Others will be. Yet others never realise they have been.</p> <p>*</p> <p>Quarantine is a demo version of retirement. There is no money. And there is nothing to do.</p> <p>*</p> <p>As a Bulgarian I have lived through the 1977 earthquake, the 1986 Chernobyl nuclear disaster, the food rationing of the early 1990s, the collapse of the Soviet Union in 1991, the hyperinflation of 1996, BSE in 2007, H5N1 in 2007, H1N1 in 2009, Fukushima in 2011, Ebola in 2014. I have also survived three or four love affairs and several ends of the world. I am an apocalypse veteran!</p> <p>*</p> <p>Right in the middle of the night I remembered the Covid-19 smitten lose their taste for food. So I got up, opened the fridge, took out several meatballs, some gherkins, some bread and a beer, and had a quick test.</p> <p>*</p> <p>The result of staying at home with the wife: Can you blink quieter, you bastard?!</p> <p>*</p> <p>Bill Gates has failed to get his Windows clean of viruses for over 30 years. Can you trust the man to develop a Covid vaccine within just a few months? </p> </div> <a href="/archive/issue-164" hreflang="en">Issue 164</a> <a href="/taxonomy/term/260" hreflang="en">coronavirus</a> <div class="field field--name-field-mt-post-category field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden field--entity-reference-target-type-taxonomy-term clearfix field__items"> <div class="field__item"><a href="/fun/joke-of-the-month" hreflang="en">JOKE OF THE MONTH</a></div> </div> <section class="field field--name-comment field--type-comment field--label-above comment-wrapper"> <h2 class="title comment-form__title">Add new comment</h2> <drupal-render-placeholder callback="comment.lazy_builders:renderForm" arguments="0=node&amp;1=337&amp;2=comment&amp;3=comment" token="wH2G9kfaxgKLsTU0Dm9HMRghii0OlUU9T2sob3FQlOI"></drupal-render-placeholder> </section> Tue, 02 Jun 2020 14:33:04 +0000 DimanaT 337 at https://vagabond.bg https://vagabond.bg/covid-19-jokes-make-rounds-bg-337#comments